Christmas is here! Christmas is daily for me though I do not say it post the Three Kings Day.

Jesus Christ renews/born in me daily. The challenges that I face since the tender age of 11 years old would leave me lost, depressed, abandoned & unloved. I remembered the ages earlier that is where I sought courage, determination & love of God instilled in me fully before my first communion.

I decorated the house lightly the outside with the bare minimum. Additional lights & decorations not used.

For thirty years, I decorate my home fully with decorations all over the house. My home was vibrant with the Noel Season. This year & I do not know when , I will be able to decorate the house for each season again. The six cats are destroying my everyday furniture. The cats are defecating all over my home. No space is exempt. It would be a true nightmare if I do not keep on praying non stop.

Praying is what makes not lose my mind completely. My memory loss has increased sharply since I was hijacked to a mental hospital July 24th,2025. I am unemployed for 5 yrs & 9 months. Praying non stop & medications help me not to hit rock bottom. I lived frugally & worked a lot in for 37 years.

That is why I am not homeless & able to pay the monthly bills & unexpected expenses ie car breakdown, gas, uniforms, clothes for my twins. I see such marvel, God sent me financial benefactors anonymously. God sent me angels on all occasions & daily.

I stayed steadfast on The Shepherd ‘s name. I am alone. I am not lonely. I am hopeful despite my living situation that I pay all the expenses of the house, yet , I find no respect, no acknowledgement in my 3 children. My eldest disrespected & continues to do so. Such effronteries for a young woman with no career. For some reason that I can not control, her failures are my failures. The twins are doing poorly at school despite using my savings to sent them twice a week to Mathnasium.esme . My eldest so often does in front of the the teen- agers that they do not respect me as well. It is heart wrenching.

No parents ought to be disrespected bluntly on every occasion from their children. I know , I am mot the only one. However, I did not work for that. I worked too hard that all 3 who feel entitled.

The entitlement is my fault, I took the abuse unflinchingly, concerned about others ‘ thoughts.

I am liberated as I spelling my shame away. Despite what is going on, I only want the best for my 3 children. Thriving academically is securing their future. They do not grasp it. The cell phone is more important. I do have any authority over the twins for my eldest contradicts every word negatively in front of the twins.

Yet , I still stand vibrant, rejuvenated, solacious, endearing for the Christ who dwells in me. No one can take Him away from me. On the contrary, He offers His hands to those who seek Him. Blessings to all.

Thanksgiving is a big deal in the USA. It a chance to meet new family members & friends.

It was the day to gobble all day without anyone frowning at you. So many delicious dishes and bakery dishes that were succulent! It was an awesome day! I sampled them all in great amount. Some families members returned to the plenty. However, I was also sad for a brief period for my Beloved mother first missing Thanksgiving with us. My mother left this flax world 3 months ago.

Long ago, I take nothing for granted. I thanked God for the many years she was in my present life through my ups & down. She was my Spiritual Advisor. Now The Almighty is the only one. I am fine with that. I feel complete, grateful even in my down time for I am sure, I am never alone. Abba watches each step I make. I find myself in a place ,I never thought, I could be.

Here, I am Joyful & relaxed because, I give my burdens to The Trinity. My steps are light. I pray for those who have it more challenging than me. I have six cats in my house, none that I wanted, yet here they are, destroying my memorabilia multiple times a day because they are running free in my home , climbing walls like monkeys. So many artifacts that are irreplaceable are destroyed. There is no end in sight for this behavior.

God is Merciful. So He gave me the grace to accept what I can not change & at the the same time, I feel very fortunate that I am alive & well. Blessings to all.